I think I like him.

This is going to be one brutally honest bloggery right here.

Well, I had a pretty severe case of the baby blue after Baby J was born, and it was awful. Medication and time has healed a lot of how I felt, but the other day is dawned on me that I genuinely LIKE Baby J now.

I always know that I LOVED him, but being someones Mama is hard work. It takes a lot of time, patience and dedication - all of which I have almost none of. I went through the motions for a few months - doing what I was supposed to do. It's a hard thing to feed someone, bathe them, clothe them, entertain them, and then do it over and over and over with what FEELS like no return except a crying baby and an even more crying and frusterated Mama.

In the last two months, Baby J has become fun. He laughs, talks, and is able to finally entertain himself and play on his own for a few minutes. He also holds his own bottle, sits up, rolls around on the floor and watches cartoons. Putting his own pacifier in his mouth has been something new, which has saved me SO much. Not to mention that he now sleeps in his crib and only wakes up once.

It's getting easier, and I am enjoying his company more often. It's a funny thing to think and to say, because I think so many people just aren't honest about the adjustment and how sometimes the attachment isn't immediate, it takes some time.

So, yeah. I really like him.